We need to talk. Are you sitting down? Okay, okay. I’m not sure I know how to say this, but…I think the video game community might have assholes in it. Yeah, I’m positive. Believe me, I wish I wasn’t.

So for those who weren’t aware, there’s a site called Metacritic. Basically metacritic is a sort of “stat keeper” for music, movies and videogame scores from various review sites. Now, for the most part that section of the site has been reliable coming from reputable sources. But then there is a dark side of the system. Gamefaqs, IGN and other large gaming sites should be painfully aware when you give a fanboy the ability to voice their opinion to be viewed by many, THE SHIT WILL HIT THE FANS. In this case, you have “M$” fanboys lowering the scores on Littlebigplanet, before it was released widely mind you. This resulted in the collective Sony irrational mob descending upon the Gears of War 2 user reviews and lowering the scores. So, yeah, this sort of shit isn’t anything new, but allow me to ask all these big sites something…why?

Maybe the better question is, why is it so easy? Major sites need to maintain some semblence of professionalism but when the doors are opened wide open to anyone with at least one finger and a keyboard you’ll get a clusterfuck of jackasses and (wait for it…) douches. Maybe reviews could be subjected to community based voting by members with prestige or GameFAQs’ karma system for some sort of integrity screening. Another idea I might suggest is a spelling and grammar system. If a review submission has X number of errors in it, into the recycling bin it should go. Trust me, no troll or fanboy has the time nor the intelligence to bother looking over what they’ve read (I swear to God if anyone e-mails me about grammatical errors in this post…). I guess what I’m saying is that there are good, reliable people out there who make legitimate points when critiquing a game but I can’t shake the feeling that they are vastly outnumbered by assholes who feel the unquenchable thirst to even that huge score we call the console rivalry . Of course this isn’t to say that all major sites are reliable because if it was, stereotypical gamer/dermatologist’s best friend/chocolate aficionado Jeff Gerstmann might still be under siege from Eidos, but still while being paid by Gamespot I might add. My message: follow your heart when reading reviews and learn to seperate the rational from the completely fucking insane…oh and read our stuff too.

So with Wii Music out and the reviews slowly dripping in, the obvious has come to pass. It sucks. God-awful? Not really, but certainly not one of Nintendo’s better showings for a console that desperately needs games. Reading some of the reviews the general consensus has been that the music is too erratic and the actual “gameplay” amount to moving the Wii remote around with the unspecified requirement of having a huge imagination…or an IQ below 30. The game stops being fun a few hours in as you realize that having a seizure could generate the same sort of response from the game as John Williams pretending he was in front of the Boston Pops.

Now I’m not saying this was a forgone conclusion *ahem*, but I think Nintendo needs to snap out this Wii simplified game trend that they seem to be leaning towards. If they want to keep making games using the Wii Fit that’s fine but don’t make them into gimmicky, demo-like shit that the current games for it seem to be going towards. Make some REAL games as well. This years Nintendo Fall Press conference provided some hope that the Wii will finally go back to the people who made it what they are with some new games that offered relevant features like decent relevant internet connectivity. Wii Music is the essence of the game that has aspirations to break the barrier to that coveted non-gamer crowd, however, the shunning of the already firmly entrenched gamer crowd seems to be a side-effect that Nintendo glossed over.

Of course there will be arguments that Wii Music was geared at the younger generation, however for a major game like this to be touted around press conferences aimed at children there’s clearly some reservation for that sort of theory. There had been first impressions everywhere that this would get mixed reviews everywhere simply due to the notion that waving around the remote would provide a deep game experience. In the age of Rock Band and Guitar Hero I understand the desire for a more simplistic approach, but there can’t be a complete disregard for the fundamentals of what makes a game rewaring for the player.